With just two and a half weeks until Christmas, children are informing me of what they will be receiving (or in some cases already have received) as gifts this year. Among the list: Playstaion 3's, iPod Touch's, Tablets, Nintendo WiiU's, Nintendo 3DS's - all single-item gifts ranging from $130-350. Some kids are getting more than one of these items and several are under 5 years old. I guess the economy is not so bad after all.
I have a real problem with spending that kind of money to buy my kids' happiness. And let's face it... That's what parents are trying to do. Parents are so afraid of disappointing their children that they are willing to dip into savings or debt to keep it from happening. What happened to being satisfied with a new toy car or a train set? What about hand-crafted gifts, which resonate more love? Kids these days (and yes I know I sound like a rambling old grandpa) have no appreciation for those thoughtful kinds of gifts. So we try to please them with getting them everything on their wish lists, which are, in my opinion, longer and more lucrative than ever.
Being in the ministry limits those types of purchases for my family (a benefit of the business), but even if I did make gads of money, I hope I would not be quick to buy these high-end gadgets for my kids. Really... does having your kids sit down before these mind-numbing devices benefit family bonding or just create more separation between you and them. Are you seeking to spend more time with your children or are you seeking an object that diverts their attention from you.I am willing to bet that the same kids who get these gifts now will be even harder to please in the future.
Last night, before I left for work, I made hand-written cards for each of my kids. I drew them silly pictures and wrote each one of them a special note telling them I loved them. I left and didn't say anything to anyone but Xoie. I told her that I left a note on her pillow. I didn't come home until after midnight, and as I was getting in bed, I saw a note on my pillow. Xoie had made her own card and did her best to draw me and her with the words, "I LOVE YOU, FROM XOIE." This morning, my wife told me they were all happy to get a note from Daddy, even Otto, our 2-year-old toddler.
These are the moments we should be trying to make at Christmas. My kids will remember them more clearly than the moments they open a toy or gadget (that will be outdated and broken in 2 years). I love my wife, my kids and my life. I wouldn't change anything about it. They make me happy. What more can I give to make them truly happy??? How about more love from me? All that costs is time and they are worth every minute.
Time with our loved ones is the only thing that can not be replaced when one is gone. Very Wise Words from you today, Jeremy. Thanks for sharing. The sad thing is that each generation wants to give more to their children than they had, maybe it is time to think about giving more time to the next generation than we had.
ReplyDeleteI don't usually reply to many posts, but I really loved this one. There were more reasons than lack of money why we never had any video games in our house. There will come a time when peer pressure will cause your children to think if it doesn't have a dollar sign attached to it, it's not worth anything. Keep doing what you are doing. Family time is not only bonding time, it is learning time - cooking, baking, canning, gardening, needlework, laundry - teaches essential life skills, math, and problem solving. Sure, you could do it all faster if the kids are safely tucked in front of the TV, but who really benefits from that in the long run? I thought I would have to wait until I was dead to hear from my daughter that all the hard work, extra chores, and being "forced" to do all kinds of work the other kids didn't have to do (because their moms did it all for them) was worth the effort. I was wrong. She comes to me for advice rather than listen to her peers. She has skills that the other girls her age don't even know exist. Her husband's friends think she is the "perfect" wife because she has all these skills and takes care of her husband when all of their wives or girlfriends are only interested in having a good time or partying. Sure, there were lots of complaints and arguments, but it was all worth it. Not a day goes by when she doesn't call or text me before going to sleep to tell me she loves me.
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